SCHNORRER OF SHNORRERS
My friend Terri often tells me that I should write a regular column entitled shnorrer of the week. It would document my often feeble efforts to spend less money, obtain discounts or get things on the cheap. She's away on holiday right now, but I know she'd be proud of my latest ruse.
It happened by chance. There I was on Friday morning scanning through the ghastly images up on JDate in search of someone passable. And there, staring at me out of the pages, was a slim, blonde, Dutch lovely going under the name of chemistry2u. She was stunning. And as I read her profile, I realised that we shared many common interests, goals and even a profession. She's perfect!
There was just one catch: I don't subscribe to JDate. Paying to get dates, I have long felt, is only one notch above paying for sex. And I've never had to do that (perhaps that's why I haven't had any for seven months). What's more, if a decent date's going to set me back £20 or £30, why on earth should I pay another £20 just for privilege of getting the date in the first place?
Luckily, I had an ace up my sleeve. My mate Ian is a member of JDate. So my solution was simple. Ian would message Dutch blondey, send her a photo of me, and let Cupid do the rest. The trick would be to tell her that he happened upon her profile, thought she was ideal for me, and would she like to meet me. "He's a shnorrer and doesn't want to pay to subscribe," was not part of the plan. I don't have an answer yet. But could she really say no after seeing my cute, little mug.
My friend Terri often tells me that I should write a regular column entitled shnorrer of the week. It would document my often feeble efforts to spend less money, obtain discounts or get things on the cheap. She's away on holiday right now, but I know she'd be proud of my latest ruse.
It happened by chance. There I was on Friday morning scanning through the ghastly images up on JDate in search of someone passable. And there, staring at me out of the pages, was a slim, blonde, Dutch lovely going under the name of chemistry2u. She was stunning. And as I read her profile, I realised that we shared many common interests, goals and even a profession. She's perfect!
There was just one catch: I don't subscribe to JDate. Paying to get dates, I have long felt, is only one notch above paying for sex. And I've never had to do that (perhaps that's why I haven't had any for seven months). What's more, if a decent date's going to set me back £20 or £30, why on earth should I pay another £20 just for privilege of getting the date in the first place?
Luckily, I had an ace up my sleeve. My mate Ian is a member of JDate. So my solution was simple. Ian would message Dutch blondey, send her a photo of me, and let Cupid do the rest. The trick would be to tell her that he happened upon her profile, thought she was ideal for me, and would she like to meet me. "He's a shnorrer and doesn't want to pay to subscribe," was not part of the plan. I don't have an answer yet. But could she really say no after seeing my cute, little mug.
posted by David Cohen at 2:01 am
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